I find that a lot of the folks that I work with or folks in my courses, oftentimes, they’re worried that they’re going to lose the relationship. For me, I would like to interrogate that and I ask, “How do you define a relationship?” If you’re in a relationship and you’re giving that person everything they want, everything they need and you’re not receiving anything in return, how is that relational? It feels like a situation, but a relationship? Like I wonder about that. You’re putting all this and still, you’re not getting anything out. It’s like going to the drive-thru and you’re just like, “Give him the order. Give him the order.” Hoping that will help. But then you never get your food, right? What exactly is this about? Why are you at the drive-thru? So I think that in that instance, for me, that’s something that I like to interrogate often is what does it mean to be successful? I think sometimes folks’ expectation is, “When I set a boundary, I’ll know that I’m successful if that person receives the boundary. I know if I’m successful if that person receives the boundary and honors it.” I like to push back on that. “No. Actually, that’s not–” Maybe that’s an ideal situation. That’s great if that happens. But then that also sort of requires you to have some level of control over the other person which you don’t. For me, to be successful in boundary work is to identify what we need and to articulate it to other people and then hold them to it. With those being various levels of a full spectrum of success, each of those actions being distinct. A person can celebrate and be like, “This is an achievement.” I think when it comes to boundary work and folks that struggle with people-pleasing, for them, I feel a lot of times, they’re struggling with losing something they don’t have. “What if I lose this relationship? They don’t talk to me anymore. They don’t take my calls. They don’t want to come to my things. They don’t want to do this.” It’s like, “Well, right.” But you’re talking about losing a lot of things that you actually don’t have in this relationship to begin with. Right now you’re talking about losing the imagined relationship, but you’re not talking about losing what you actually have, which is someone who is refusing to be there for you.